By Kathi Bush MA, LCPC
Note: Because of the length of this blog, it will be broken up into six segments, and posted over the course of a couple weeks. In this segment, Part One, we introduce the topic and list five points regarding trust that will be covered throughout the blog. Thank you for joining me in this important topic!
In recent blogs, Pastor Dan has been writing about relationships and how to build meaningful connections with others. He asked me to write a blog about building trust in relationships. Fortunately for us, the content in his blogs has laid the groundwork for this topic. So if you haven’t read those blogs already, you should.
I’m always seeking to build and maintain a healthy community of people for me and my family. We need others we trust to help support and fuel us through life. We need their encouragement, healing presence, guidance, wisdom, and modelling. And we can help give all of that to them, as well.
Before we go further, I want to point out that when we think of building trust in relationships, we often think of it in terms of friendships only. But we also need to consider building – and maintaining – trust within marital and family relationships. Deeper emotional trust may dissipate some if not mindfully tended to. It needs tending in routine interactions and stepped up attention during conflict or relationship injury. Sometimes we forget to nurture trust in these relationships, which are often the most influential in our lives.
So let’s begin
When I think of trust, five points come to mind. They are not “steps” to build trust, but rather characteristics I believe need to be in place so that trust can be established, then maintained, over time. They are:
1.Trust is established only in time.
2.Trust should happen with “safe” people.
3.Trust is established when good repair work is done following a relationship injury.
4.Trust should coincide with good judgment and character discernment.
5.Be someone trustworthy.